Theory of 5

On a wonderful Santa Fe evening in 2002, my husband and I and another couple, with whom we were great friends, devised our Theory of 5. The underlying question being, "how many people in your life would you feel comfortable calling from jail, knowing they would do whatever it took to get you out, and there would be no strings of guilt or recrimination?"

The answer was 5 - which we considered to be a best case scenario at any point in one's life.

5...that's not a lot. If you met 1 new person every week of your adult life starting at 21 through age 70, you'd rack up 2,548 people. Yet, at any given point in time, you'd only have 5 you'd trust in a critical situation. That says a lot for the rarity and value of true unconditional trust.

Knowing trust is earned, over time...by behavior, I pay a lot of attention to mine and value others who behave similarly, as they are the ones I may learn to trust.

I feel lucky to have my 4, for Jack Cooper, my 5th, passed away in 2006 from cancer. I am also fortunate to have formed some new relationships lately that I hope help me exceed our Theory of 5.